Vicious Cycle

Blog Post by Wendy Kauffman

These last few weeks have been very difficult for me. Not a day has gone by where I wish I could just leave this place. I don't know if my doubts are normal, o.k., or just part of what we are doing. I doubt everyday that I can do this. That I can get through all of this mentally. There have been many days where I just wanted to stay in bed. Hidden from all the ugliness that exists outside my door.  I confessed to my husband on Saturday that I am finding myself not liking people very much at all right now. That this whole process of loving those cast out by society has made me not like most other people I come in contact with. I know it is not right, but that is where I am many days.

Tonight on my way to work I pulled up to one of the intersections close to the park where we serve breakfast every Saturday morning. One of our regulars was walking up the street, panhandling, as many of them do. As he got closer, I rolled down my window to say hi, as we always do. I tried to hand him a dollar, he turned me down as they normally do if they know us. After we chatted a few minutes waiting for the light to turn green, A police officer walked up behind him, grabbed him by the back of the shirt and pulled him over to the side of the road. The officer continued to shove him up the road until they returned to the patrol car, where he pushed him up against the car and cuffed him. He never identified himself before grabbing my friend, and he was far more rough than what he needed to be with a homeless guy who barely has the strength to walk, let alone fight this officer.

I was very upset! I wanted to get out of my car and tell him what for. I mean all they are going to do is take this guy to jail, keep him for 3 days, take all the money he has to house him in the county jail until they release him back to the streets to start over. A vicious cycle!

What I really wanted to know was why his heart was so bitter towards this man that he needed to handle him that way. Why couldn't he show love and compassion. Then it hit me tonight.

Maybe he does not know what love and compassion is? Maybe no one has ever showed that to him.

I surely didn't in that moment. I wanted to jump out of my car and treat that police officer the same way he was treating my friend. I didn't because I have kids and don't really fancy spending any amount of time in the county jail, but that is what I felt in my heart.

The reality is that my resentment to that officer was no different than his resentment for the homeless man! So how do I change it? What can I do to make a difference? If the cycle is going to change, is it possible that it needs to start with me? I have been spending a lot of time talking to God about this and asking Him to give me his eyes for people. It is a lot harder than I thought it would be! God did that for me tonight and honestly it hurts. Now to go and turn the tide!

Please pray for us! Pray that we will see each person we meet with the Love God has for them and that we will not  become bitter and hurt by what we see but that God uses it for good!

spring break

The long dreadful winter is over and spring break has arrived! This is when the South Florida locals receed inland and willingly give the beach to the un-numerable hords of college students that decend upon us from the North. It is especially hard to get around town, as traffic to the beach is so backed up it affects the normal flow of traffic everywhere.

It is also the time when the homeless are "shewed away" from the beach so as not to bother the visiting tourists. This can end very badly for the homeless, since the police can sometimes be overzealous in their efforts to clean up the beach.

Please pray for the safety of the homeless for the next couple of weeks as the breakers show up in force. Pray that those who are displaced will find safe new places to sleep.

fishy business

We've all heard the old Chinese proverb ~

"Give a man a fish, feed him for a day, teach a man to fish, feed him for life"

Well, one of the things we have been doing is teaching the homeless how to work. We did this first by offering gift cards to those who collect a bag of trash around the park where we serve breakfast. Those who have proven to be dependable workers soon get the opportunity to help me move someone or to make a delivery or go assemble furniture. They get paid $10 hour and gain valuable work experience.

Well our main source of work has died. The old work van blew its engine and has driven its last mile. We are in dire need of a delivery truck, but, lack the necessary funds to get into one. We need approximately $2000 to get a truck, get it licensed and insured and continue teaching the homeless how to work.

If you've been wanting to help out, but have been waiting for the right opportunity, here it is! Just click on the "donate" button to the right to give today!

wall flower

I love how God makes himself available to everyone. He is not an exclusive God, available only to "his elect" but casts his love wide, calling out to everyone, as evidenced so much in the Bible and in every day life.

About 10 or 15 years ago we went to visit a church in Columbia, Missouri. It was a charismatic church and during the service at one point it was time for prayer. So, we all stood up and the lady that was talking started praying, then she started talking in a different language then her demeanor changed and she shouted out some sort of prophesy. Then she squinted her eyes and squatted down a little while holding her hand out, waving it around like she was Spider-Man and in true Benny Hinn style, the WHOLE audience fell over like a wave had pushed them down, EVERYONE! 

Everyone, except me. I looked around at all these people lying down "slain in the spirit" and then looked back at her. Then she double whammied me, but, I still stood. She reached way back to Texas and triple whammied me, but, I still stood.

I don't know what the purpose of everyone falling over was, but, it made me feel like I was not part of the club and that I was not qualified to hear or even pray to God. It took a little while but God showed me how that simply was not true.

Have you ever felt like you were on the outside and God wasn't anywhere to be found? This might be hard to believe, but, it's simply not true. God not only hears you, he wants to hear from you. I'd like to suggest you take the epic challenge, see for your self how much God loves you just as you are.

Obama phones

The other morning I sent out a few text messages to some of the homeless guys, letting them know breakfast would be ready for them at 9am at the park. It might surprise you that almost every homeless person on the streets has a government cell phone. It makes it easy to catch up with them, if they are not out of minutes. They only get 250 minutes a month.

After a while I got a text back from Dwayne that said "got to work, but, thanks anyway". I was glad he was working, but, sad I wouldn't be seeing him.

At about 9:30 a guy I had never met before walked right up and grabbed a place to sit like he had known me for years. We talked about everything and I could see that God had given him a gift. He has the ability to make friends where ever he goes and there isn't an ounce of judgmentalism in him.

Come to find out Dwayne sent him over. I can see that God has big plans for this guy and would love it if you would pray for him, his name is Brian.

Also. please pray for ponytail Jerry, old man Jerry and Minah-bird, who are all locked up in county for soliciting donations (panhandling) without a permit.

broken neck

It's been 3 weeks since I had neck surgery and I am getting better. I still have to wear a rigid neck brace that is mostly uncomfortable, I am getting used to it though. If all goes well I get to take it off in 4 more weeks.

I am still not allowed to work, we still don't have a family vehicle and we still don't have a delivery truck. We have raised about half of our living expenses, but, still lack the other half necessary to take care of rent and utilities.

Somehow we were able to make it to the park on Saturday morning to feed the hungry homeless. We've made some new friends and it appears a core group is starting to form. We will continue to nurture these relationships and reach out how ever we can. We are planning on a large Easter dinner and inviting them all over to our house to eat and hang out.

Please pray that God will continue to use us in the lives of the homeless and that he will provide for all of our needs.

If you have not taken the opportunity to partner with us already, you can do so by clicking on the "donate" button to the right.

gun shots

The other night, as we were preparing for bed, I was sitting in the kitchen and a couple blocks away seven gun shots rang out. I looked at Wendy and said, "oh, that's not good". A few minutes later we were lying in bed and we heard shouting outside and all the neighborhood dogs, including ours, started going crazy. We got up and looked out the window to find 7 police cars in tactical positions with all the officers pointing their weapons at a small Honda Accord in the middle of the street in front of our house.

They had the driver toss his gun out and then had him get out of the car with his hands in full view above his head. They then had him walk backwards to the nearest police car where they cuffed him and put him inside. Then they had a second guy get out of the car and it looked as though they were going to shoot him right on the spot, but, it ended peacefully. Within 15 minutes the car was towed, the suspects were taken to jail and the police were all gone.

There was never a mention of any of it in the news. In fact 6 hours later I was getting up to cook breakfast to take to the homeless and we didn't even talk about it!

This is not the first time we've witnessed something like this since arriving to South Florida and though it seems a little unnerving, we don't seem to be to concerned about it. I guess it's just that "peace that passes all understanding" talked about in the Bible.

It's been proven time and time again that even in the most dire of situations, God is there to comfort us.

Be a Renegade

One of my favorite pastor's has a new book out. You have to got to get it! If you have not read anything that Vince Antonucci has written,well then you need to and you might as well start with this book!

Description:

How do you live for God? Really live for God, in a way that provides intimacy with God and leads to influence for him in the world? And what impact could a life, truly lived for God, have on this world?

In, Renegade: Your Faith Isn’t Meant To Be Safe, Vince Antonucci challenges readers to live radically, to live the life of a renegade. A renegade is a person who rejects conventional behavior, who... refuses to do what others are doing, and who realizes there’s a different beat they can dance to—and it’s better. Renegades realize “normal” isn’t working for anyone else, nor is it working for them. So they abandon normal to find right. It may not be easy, but it’s the only way to truly live for God and have maximum impact with your life.

In Renegade, Vince teaches readers how to cultivate a real relationship with God, and then equips them to discover and live out their unique calling. Antonucci provides encouragement and inspiration for readers to overcome their fear so they can take the risks faith requires.

Warning: If you read this book you may just stop playing it safe, and start playing it dangerous. Your life will never be the same.

I am serious, get this book! You can order it on Amazon.com. Get it Today!

the old ox died

ReMerge, is at a real critical point right now. We have lost our work van that not only delivers food to the homeless, but helps employ some of them. TODAY we need to buy a delivery truck to replace it, but, don't have the funds due to our shoe string budget.

"Where there are no oxen, the manger is empty, but from the strength of an ox come abundant harvests." ~ Proverbs 14:4

Now that our Ox (work van) has died, please help us buy a new one so we can continue bringing new life to the hopeless.

To help either click on the convienent paypal "donate" button to the right or email us at remerge@hotmail.com to find the very best option for you (Please pass this need on to your friends and neigbors).